What is Your New Year's Resolution? Is it similar to last year?
Do you feel frustrated or guilty because you're unable to follow through on what you said would create better, healthier habits? You said you would start exercising and did it on January 1st, but now you find millions of reasons why you don't.
Do you know why you're not able to follow through with the changes you want to make in your life? It's because of habits.
Get our guide in creating new empowering habits that will lead you to deeper self-love and less stressful living, Finding Your Lost Self: Your 30-Day Journey to Self-Love (Amazon). You can also get this book from our website (if you want signed copies).
What are habits?
Habits are activities (thinking, feeling, actions) that we regularly do and become automatic to us. They are unconscious behaviors. We've been doing it so often that it has become second nature. We don't think about it anymore; we do it. For example, I have a habit of watching TV while eating. It's automatic; I pick up the remote control to turn on the TV when I have my food ready. I paired eating with watching TV. One day, I tried to break this habit because I often wasted too much of my time, and sometimes, I missed conversations with my husband when we were eating together. But boy, breaking this habit was harder than I thought. I attempted several times, but the association between the two was challenging to break.
Do you have a habit that you find hard to break? If so, continue reading. We will unpack the proven steps to change unwanted habits to more empowering ones.
How Do You Change Your Bad Habits?
You can take the following steps to change unwanted habits and replace them with empowering habits.
Recognize the habits you want to change and then identify the triggering factors.
How is this done? Simple. Pay attention to what you are doing. For example, you struggle to sleep and wake up tired in the morning.
Pay attention to the activities you were doing at least an hour before you sleep. Are you binge-watching TV? Are you working on your computer, surfing the net, or on social media? What time did you sleep? What food did you eat that afternoon, or what were you drinking? One of these or a combination of these practices affects your sleep.
Suppose you habitually drink caffeinated drinks or eat heavy dinners before you sleep. In that case, these will affect your ability to sleep. Try drinking organic stress relief tea (AMAZON) or calming tea (AMAZON) instead. Please know that I will get a commission when you buy through links with AMAZON.
Also, when you watch the news or surf social media before sleeping, the light from your TV, computer, phone, and other gadgets affects your sleep in addition to whatever emotions are triggered by the news you watch or what you see on social media. Become aware of these behaviors and then consciously add habits that would increase your sleep, such as listening to calming music an hour before you sleep, reading inspiring books, journaling, and meditation.
My favorite go-to relaxing habits before sleeping are prayer and meditation. I got Alexa (AMAZON). I just tell Alexa to play calm, relaxing songs or meditation songs, and it will play songs for me. I don't have to use my phone to play music that could tempt me to browse other things.
Find a Compelling Reason why you MUST change your bad habits.
I was listening to Tony Robbins, and I was struck when he talked about making our aspirations in life a MUST. However, we can't make something a MUST if we have no significant reason why we must do something. For example, I started learning to drive in 2009. I failed multiple times, even when I went to two driving schools. The reason I kept failing was I had an accident that caused me so much fear of driving on my own. My husband also made it easier for me to get to where I needed to be through ride-hailing services.
Until one day last year in 2024, I felt I MUST learn to drive. When I made it a must, I set a goal of getting my driver's license and car. Then, with the use of the Neuro-linguistic Program (NLP) and prayers, I found help to break free from my fear and got my driver's license and car.
If you are interested in how NLP can help you, schedule your complimentary session here. Remember, limited slots are available. So schedule your session now.
Visualize Yourself Doing Your Desired Habits.
You need to have your unconscious mind on board with your desire. Your unconscious mind stores your memories, beliefs, and other information that affects your behavior. My NLP instructor told us that our conscious mind is the goal-setter, but the unconscious mind is the goal-getter.
The best way to communicate this part is through images and emotions. Visualize yourself doing the habit that you want to establish. For example, if you start an exercise routine, imagine yourself excitedly getting into your exercise gear and seeing its benefits. Intensify the good feelings about yourself exercising.
When you need help creating new habits, hop in our complimentary 30-minute coaching session. What is your desired outcome? Visualize that you already live with it.
Ask for Support from those who love and care about you.
Pray and meditate.
I believe in the power of collaboration between God and me. I know I have strengths that I can utilize to create new habits, but the process will be faster if I have the help of someone higher than me and who created me. God has my blueprint. Therefore, God knows what's best for me. When you ask for God's help, God will guide you to your next steps and will guide you to the people you need in your journey.
Bad habits, though sometimes hard to break, are not impossible to replace.
Take the challenge. You can track your new habits through devices like Fitbit. I use Fitbit (AMAZON) to track my exercise and steps, and my niece uses an Apple Watch (AMAZON).
When you're ready to create new habits and don't know where to begin, get my book, Finding Your Lost Self: Your 30-Day Journey to Self-Love. You can buy it on Amazon, or if you want a signed copy, you can get it from our website, lovehealbelieve.com
God bless you for creating your new, healthy, empowering habits, Beautiful You!
About Dolly
Dolly Tampos Oksman, MA, MAED-SPED, is a Transformational Speaker, Author, Certified Wellness Coach, Special Education Teacher, and Behavior Analyst. She is the Founder and Owner of Love. Heal. Believe. LLC.
Dolly experienced chronic stress that affected her mental and emotional health. However, when she entered the convent to be a missionary nun, she learned the secrets of how to live a fulfilled life with inner peace and joy. Today, she is sharing those secrets with you.
Dolly is on a mission to help you develop a deeper love for yourself and find long-term solutions to stress. Her new book, Finding Your Lost Self, which is also available on AMAZON and her programs & Services will take you on a step-by-step journey to a happier, healthier, and calmer life with less stress.
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