The holiday season is a time of joy and celebration. Still, it can also bring a unique set of challenges for caregivers of autistic children. Among sensory overload, changes in routine, and societal expectations, the holidays can quickly become a source of stress. However, with the right mindset and strategies, it is possible to navigate this season with peace and joy.
What causes stress among parents and caregivers around the Holiday season?
1. Sensory Overload. During the Holiday season, stress triggers are everywhere, especially for autistic children. The noise, the bright lights, the smell, crowded places, unfamiliar places when you take them to visit your family, and the busyness of the season that is exciting for some can cause an autistic child sensory overload that may lead to a meltdown and behavior challenges. This is very stressful and overwhelming for parents when they occur in public places and can lead to frustration.
2. Changes in Routine. The holidays often disrupt daily schedules, which can create anxiety for both you and your child. During the holidays, school is off, and your child's regular therapy sessions and activities will be on halt due to therapists and teachers taking their breaks as well. Therefore, you need to fill in this time for your child to keep them occupied and navigate these changes that can be exhausting.
3. Social Expectations. I have parents who shared with me that they feel they are not good parents because they can't control their children's behavior. They feel judged by others because their children scream, run away from them, throw things, and show signs of aggression during family gatherings and social events. They feel pressured to conform or explain their child's behaviors to others.
4. Personal Burnout: As a teacher of autistic children and other disabilities, I understand the needs of your autistic child, and they can take so much from you as a caregiver, especially if you have other children and other responsibilities. You may feel stretched thin trying to meet everyone's needs, leaving little time for self-care. Many caregivers, perhaps you're one of them, prioritize the needs of others first and put themselves last.
How will you manage those stressors?
Before I continue, Download Our Free Autism Guide for Caregivers and Teachers. Get practical tips and strategies to lessen stress tailored to help caregivers and educators of autistic children. In this guide, you will also learn easy-to-use strategies to help your child manage their sensory overload, navigate changes in their schedule, and address other behavioral challenges. Click here to download it now.
Here are Practical Tips to Manage Holiday Stress
1. Plan Ahead. You know what triggers your child, sensory needs, interest, and other needs. When there are changes in their schedule, or you take them to a family gathering that may lead to sensory overload and behavior issues, think ahead of what you can do to prevent those behaviors that you find stressful. What is helpful for my students are social stories. Whenever we have field trips or when I want them to attend a field rally at our school, I create social stories.
In that story, I show them pictures of what they will see, who will be there, what is expected of them, and whatever I need for my students to know. Then, I show them the calendar when it happens, and every day, we have a countdown, and I make it exciting so they will look forward to it. I also have a visual schedule so they know when it will be. Then, I gather sensory tools and toys to bring to the event to mitigate sensory overload and prevent possible meltdowns and other undesirable behavior.
You can do the same thing with your child. Create a social story so they know what to expect during the holidays, have a countdown to let your child know that the family gathering is coming, and create a visual schedule. Don't hesitate to inform family members about your child's needs and preferences. Bring familiar items like toys, headphones, or sensory tools to gatherings to help your child feel secure.
2. Set Realistic Expectations. Understand your limits. Know what is essential and what's not and reflect on what you do only to please others. Perhaps this is the time to let go of those unimportant things and those you just do to please others so you can focus on what matters most for your family and yourself. Be OK with skipping certain traditions if they cause unnecessary stress. Also, let go of the need for perfection and be OK when you make mistakes. Celebrate in a way that feels meaningful to you, your family, and your autistic child.
3. Create a Calm Space. A calm space is vital for your autistic child, especially during family gatherings. Designate a quiet area at home or during gatherings where your child can retreat if they feel overwhelmed. If you're attending a gathering somewhere other than your home, don't hesitate to ask the host if they have a quiet space for your child. Know that they are your family members or friends; they will understand your needs.
Also, don't forget to create a quiet space for yourself. A space where you can retreat, replenish, and regroup even for a short time when you feel tired and overwhelmed or want to relax. Aside from physical space, cultivate calm space within through doing mindfulness activities, like deep breathing or listening to soft music, prayer, and meditation. When I feel overwhelmed, prayer and deep breathing usually relax me and put my mind at ease and peace.
4. Prioritize Self-Care. Time for yourself is vital for all caregivers. Many usually lack it because of the time taken from us caring for others. However, burnout and fatigue can be detrimental to our lives and relationships. Make time for your own well-being. Even 10 minutes of prayer, reflection, or meditation can recharge your spirit. Doing something you love to do can recharge your mind and make you feel happy and, thus, will recharge your tired mind and body. Seek support from friends, family, or a community of caregivers who understand your experiences.
I invite you to join our Facebook group, Autism Caregivers and Teachers Wellness Sanctuary, where we provide tips and strategies that will help improve your mental health and wellness and support your autistic child. Connect with a community of like-minded caregivers who share your journey. Find encouragement, resources, and support. [Join here.]
If you want more tips in navigating autism caregiving with less stress and more peace, Please Subscribe to Our YouTube Channel to discover videos filled with self-care tips, stress-reduction strategies, and inspirational messages for caregivers and teachers.
Final Thought:
Being a caregiver is not easy. It can be very exhausting. However, have faith and know that God has given you a mission. It is not a coincidence that you have an autistic child. There is a reason that I know you will eventually uncover it if you haven't yet. Remember that you don't have to carry the weight alone. Lean into your faith for strength, guidance, and peace. Trust that God's love and providence will see you through.
Matthew 11:28 says, "Come to me, all you who are weary and burdened, and I will give you rest."
Rest in the promise that God has your back and will not leave you on this journey. Trust that God equips you with the patience and love to navigate any challenge.
The holidays can be challenging, but they also offer an opportunity to create new traditions that reflect your family's unique needs and values. By prioritizing your well-being and giving thanks, you can transform holiday stress into moments of connection and joy.
Remember, you are not alone. Reach out, take advantage of the resources available, and give yourself the grace to enjoy this special time with your child.
If you feel overwhelmed and stressed out and need guidance, Schedule Your Complimentary 30-minute One-on-One Coaching Session. Share your unique challenges with me, and we will develop a personalized plan to find balance and peace.
Let's make this holiday season a time of peace, love, and joy.
With you in journey to inner peace, joy, and love,
Dolly Oksman
About Dolly
Dolly Tampos Oksman, MA, MAED-SPED, is a Transformational Speaker, Author, Certified Wellness Coach, Special Education Teacher, and Behavior Analyst. She is the Founder and Owner of Love. Heal. Believe. LLC.
Dolly experienced chronic stress that affected her mental and emotional health. However, when she entered the convent to be a missionary nun, she learned the secrets of how to live a fulfilled life with inner peace and joy. Today, she is sharing those secrets with you.
Dolly is on a mission to help you develop a deeper love for yourself and find long-term solutions to stress. Her new book, Finding Your Lost Self, which is also available on AMAZON and her programs & Services will take you on a step-by-step journey to a happier, healthier, and calmer life with less stress.
Kommentare