📖 "Be kind and compassionate to one another, forgiving each other, just as in Christ God forgave you." – Ephesians 4:32
Are there people in your life that you find so hard to forgive? Perhaps they did something that deeply hurt you, or you think they screwed you up, and you feel betrayed.
At a point in my life, I felt betrayed by a friend. It deeply wounded me because I trusted that person. There was a time when I woke up in the middle of the night because I felt a stab in my heart. I cried and wanted to curse that person because of the pain I felt, but my mouth was shut. I can't open it.
Then, an inspiration came to me that instead of cursing and wishing bad things would happen to that person, I would say prayers instead and pray for good things to happen to that person. I struggled to obey that voice, but with tears in my eyes, I obeyed that inspiration; I prayed earnestly for that person who betrayed me. I prayed for blessings, good health, joy, and peace.
Then, a miracle happened: I felt better. I realized that the prayer I said was not just for the person who hurt me, but it was for me. Because I said those prayers, I started to release my hatred, and healing began. I was also amazed because I received all the wonderful things I prayed for that night for the person who hurt me. God has rewarded my obedience to forgive.
Forgiveness is one of the most profound acts of grace we can offer—to others and ourselves. There are moments in our lives when it is easier to forgive others, but we are so hard on ourselves. In Ephesians 4:32, Paul reminds us that forgiveness is rooted in kindness and compassion, mirroring how God forgives us. This is to say that your sins and mistakes are forgiven; why can't you forgive?
How do we truly embrace this principle in our daily lives? Let's explore the deeper meaning behind forgiveness and its transformative power.
Forgiveness Starts with Kindness & Compassion
Paul's message isn't just saying, "I forgive you." It's about approaching others with a heart filled with kindness and compassion. True forgiveness begins when we choose to see people through God's love rather than through the lens of our pain. When we understand that everyone carries their own struggles, imperfections, and burdens, it becomes easier to extend grace—even to those who have wronged us.
However, it is also easier to forgive and be compassionate with others if we are compassionate with ourselves. When we love and accept ourselves for who we are and acknowledge our imperfections and limitations, it is easier to understand others and let go. Love yourself, be compassionate with yourself, and know that imperfections are our path to finding our true, authentic selves. Learn how to develop a deeper love for yourself. Order my book, Finding Your Lost Self: Your 30-Day Journey to Self-Love. This is also a perfect gift for someone you know who needs to increase self-compassion and self-love.
Forgiveness is a Gift, Not a Transaction
There are many misconceptions about forgiveness. Some thought that when you forgive, you forget or pretend it didn't happen. No. There are wrongdoings that you should not forget. You learn from them and be mindful that they will not happen again. For example, people who abuse you in different forms. You forgive them but don't allow them to abuse you again. Forgiveness is about releasing the burden of resentment from our hearts. Holding onto bitterness, anger, or grudges doesn't harm the other person—it only weighs us down. Jesus forgave us freely, not because we deserved it, but because of His boundless love.
When we forgive, we free ourselves from the chains of past pain and step into God's peace. What's one small step you can take toward releasing bitterness today?
We Forgive Because We Have Been Forgiven
I love this saying from C.S. Lewis, "I think that if God forgives us, we must forgive ourselves. Otherwise, it is almost like setting ourselves up as a higher tribunal than Him." One of the hardest things to remember when we struggle with forgiveness is that God first forgave us. His love for us is unconditional—not because we were perfect, but because of His grace. If we accept His forgiveness, we are called to extend the same grace to others, especially yourself.
Sometimes, the hardest person to forgive is ourselves. We dwell on past mistakes, replay our regrets, and struggle to move forward. But if God has forgiven us, who are we to withhold forgiveness from ourselves?
Have you accepted God's forgiveness for yourself? What's one way you can extend grace to yourself today?
When I struggle to forgive, I look at Jesus's cross. The cross symbolizes God's acceptance of us and forgiveness, and His resurrection reminds me to let go of my mistakes and failures and move forward.
Available on Amazon. If you order this product using this link, I will get a little commission.
🙏 A Prayer for Forgiveness
Heavenly Father, soften my heart where there is resentment. Teach me to love and forgive, just as You have forgiven me. Fill me with Your grace to release bitterness and walk in peace. Please give me the strength to extend kindness, even when difficult. In Jesus' name, Amen.
Let's Reflect Together: Do you struggle with forgiveness? What has helped you let go of past hurts? Share your thoughts in the comments below. Let's walk this journey of grace together! 💛
Don't hesitate to contact me if you need help forgiving yourself and others.
About Dolly
Dolly Tampos Oksman, MA, MAED-SPED, is a Transformational Speaker, Author, Certified Wellness Coach, Special Education Teacher, and Behavior Analyst. She is the Founder and Owner of Love. Heal. Believe. LLC.
Dolly experienced chronic stress that affected her mental and emotional health. However, when she entered the convent to be a missionary nun, she learned the secrets of how to live a fulfilled life with inner peace and joy. Today, she is sharing those secrets with you.
Dolly is on a mission to help you develop a deeper love for yourself and find long-term solutions to stress. Her new book, Finding Your Lost Self, which is also available on AMAZON and her programs & Services will take you on a step-by-step journey to a happier, healthier, and calmer life with less stress.
Комментарии